No one wants to work with a robot, but if you’re a working remotely, your co-workers might wonder: who is this person? Your work is perfect, your e-mails are crisp, and you speak up (very professionally, too) on conference calls. You’re very careful to not give the impression that you’re working on a beach and sipping mojitos all day (Especially if that’s the case).
You might want to rethink that. Being informal and giving people an insight to how you think can actually be a very powerful way to build relationships. Without the constant filter of professional-speak, people feel like they “know” you, you seem more approachable, you make everyone feel more comfortable, and you give the illusion of “being there” even if you’re thousands of miles away. The key is balance.
Here are two wildly different examples:
Example 1: My husband is a joker. He has been working remotely for a subsidiary of Gannett for the past four years (in a creative department) and has seemingly mastered the art of making people laugh when his only tools are e-mail and client conference calls. He convinced co-workers to participate in Moustache March. He makes jokes on calls. He responds to e-mail forwards with his own silliness — and they love it. In his annual reviews, they highlighted his ability to make working with him fun.
Example 2: When I worked at the University of Texas, a co-worker was overseeing a software upgrade from home. She sent out this missive, “After I take a shower, I’ll run this test file through the interface.” In this university environment, that was akin to telling people she was going to the bathroom for a “number two.” ”Completely inappropriate” and “unprofessional” were bandied about for weeks later. However, this is the same department where pantyhose are required for women and not wearing a tie was cause to be sent home for the day.
The point of these two examples is to illustrate how important it is to know your company culture and where the lines of formality begin and end. Where sending a funny video to your co-workers might be seen as the height of inter-office hilarity in one situation, it could be cause for disciplinary action in another. Know where the line is first, but don’t be afraid to rub against it every once in a while.
Your arsenal for making allies and breaking down walls:
Your tone. I once had a consultant that I worked with that always made you feel like he was sitting in the room with you, even though he was literally thousands of miles away. Slow down, try to keep your voice open and friendly, and imagine (if it helps) that you’re sitting in the same room.
Making small talk. There always seems to be an awkward few moments in the beginning of the call: everyone is dialing in, there might be a false start or a technical glitch. Take your lead from the facilitator, if they lob you a comment about the weather, you have your in. Using this time well can put everyone at ease and give you a chance to learn something new, whether about the project or the latest sports game.
Remember the personal details. Sales people tend to make notes on their contacts such as, “two kids, Molly and Jack,” which might not be a terrible idea for the rest of us. In any case, people remember you more for how much you remember them.
Letting your natural voice come through in e-mail. Once you’ve built a relationship, or even before, making an effort to strip out the jargon and writing as you speak is a great tool for getting better and more in depth responses. If you take away the need to be formal, people feel more free to quickly respond with what they think, without having to over-think the “best way” to say it.
Sharing your thought process. This is one of my favorites if you’re tackling a large problem that has many moving pieces. Instead of jumping in with a flat answer, spelling out your thinking behind several options can let the team latch onto your idea quicker.
Self depreciation. Are you a horrible speller? Admit it! Someone who is realistic and honest about their short comings (within reason, no Eeyores, thanks) can instantly form bonds with other people. There was a engineer I worked with who loved to tell us just how horrible he was at certain things, all the while spinning the room towards his original plan.
The joke. Things getting tense? There is no better way to instantly deflate a situation than a well timed bon mot. If you’re not too comfortable, best to test out a small joke in a non-tense moment, you don’t want a Michael Scott moment.
Swearing. People who can pull this off, can move mountains. What is more conspiratorial than a well-placed curse word? If you need to convince someone that you’re on their side, simply agreeing with them won’t do it, you call it what it is: bullshit! (Use with care, not for everyone).
Know your audience. Yes, you probably shouldn’t go into your first conference call and shout out, “What up, bitches?” but then what do I know, seems to work miracles for my husband.
What do you think?
Trackback URL for this post: http://www.digitalnomads.com/2009/04/the-power-of-informality/trackback
Comments (1)
Trackbacks and Pingbacks
Comment
Nomad Contributors
It all comes down to your ability to judge the situation and familiarity. The beautiful thing about informality is that it builds rapport and trust. The danger is that it can easily offend or result in the violation of certain workplace norms if you misjudge or are not careful.